My Third List of Queer Content on Netflix

Hey pals,

We are onto part three of the queer media I am finding on Netflix (obviously this is not just Queer media, this is just the media with Queer rep and letting you know if it’s a disappointment or not). Hope you enjoy this list during Pride Month of 2020.

Tales of the City – basically everyone is queer and live on an estate-like gay commune, racial diversity, one disabled (deaf) queer person, black, asian and latinx queers, bisexuals and the spectrum, lesbians, trans man, black drag queen, trans woman, couple who have threesomes, and the one dedicated straight duo whose child is one of the gays but (get this) the straight couple lived in the gay commune first! It’s pretty fun but also really on it with inner community violence and prejudice. Highly recommend. 

One Day At A Time – Elana is gay, has a genderqueer partner who uses they/them pronouns, a lesbian cousin married to her wife. Had this recommended to me a long while ago and binged the show. It also has so much other great rep (latinx families, addiction, mental health, disability benefits, being a single parent, etc.) very family friendly but also very on it politically. Great show (and glad to say it’s coming back!)

Friends With Benefits – gay best friend. That is all. 

Always Be My Maybe – queer best friend of female lead, poc in a wlw relationship having a baby, basically some side rep just coz they can which is still nice to see. Also the film generally is great with two asian leads in a RomCom. Very funny, very cute. 

Wine Country – White middle age lesbian, young Asian queer woman. This is a fun film with tonnes of leading women in their 40’s. Mostly white, which is no surprise but it’s pretty good. 

When they see us – last episode it is revealed one of the boys has a trans sibling (a Black trans woman), this is an incredible show. Very dark, based on real life events. Very important watch but also quite unsettling. 

Easy A – the guy she does detention with is a gay white dude. I think this film is pretty funny and well spoken about the issue of slut-shaming. 

Saved! – her boyfriend is gay and they have a love child at the end after he busts out of the conversion therapy center with his new boyfriend. Sorry spoilers but its a RomCom and I thought you should know it does end well for him. It honestly hilarious in a very late 90’s-early 2000’s way. 

Degrassi: next gen – new generation gay dude, bi dude, a brief weird poly thing, Asian gay guy gamer, nonbinary afab gamer. A nice little sprinkling of rep across gender and race. It’s cringe but I actually really enjoyed it and I’ve never seen the original Degrassi. 

Otherhood – one of the sons is gay and has a boyfriend and lives with other gay men and has a lesbian couple friend. I won’t lie, coming back to this list to add details and thoughts, I couldn’t remember this film. It wasn’t terrible but I wouldn’t go watch it again. 

Everything sucks! – main girl is a lesbian. Kiss at the end of the series. I hope there’s a follow up coz this was such a long build up and quite enjoyable. 

Unfinished Business – someone who works for the competitor is gay and they all go to a gay sex club in Germany. Typical dude film (kinda like the Hangover) so if that’s your thing you might enjoy this. It was alright to watch but wouldn’t watch again. 

Rough Night – wlw relationship at beginning (later one of them is divorcing a husband and the wlw couple aren’t together) two main characters woc. A couple looking for a third. This has Scarlett Johansson in it but if you can ignore her (she is the least likable character and also badly acted) then it’s not a terrible film, quite funny. Kinda like a lot of dude-bro films where they all got really fucked up and ended up in a really shite situation (the Hangover) and I like when it’s turned into a women lead film, they’re funnier to me the humour is similar but less gross.

Falling Inn Love – husbands who run a cafe in New Zealand (side characters) very minimal role but I thought they were cute so wanted to include them. This is a very tacky RomCom but I liked it enough to keep it on my list on Netflix. 

Hearts Beat Loud – main character (daughter) is queer and has love interest. Both woc. This is a very cute film with a daughter and her single father. She wants to go to school and studies hard but he wants her to give singing a shot (coz she has a wonderful singing voice) and I love this actress. 

Atypical – doesn’t get gay until near end of season 2 and gets gayer in season 3. Possibly two bi girls, or realising they are gay. Unsure, obviously going to be explored next season as this season was more about the two getting together (spoilers sorry). I really enjoy this show, though it is apparently linked to Autism Speaks which is a really shitty charity. Not sure on the link but I was sad to hear it as the queer rep is so good! Also the queer main character is played by a nonbinary actor!

Derry Girls – one of the main group comes out as a lesbian ep 4/5. This is a really funny comedy based in Ireland during a very real TIME they had in the 90’s. It was super interesting watching it, but also entirely daft a lot of the time. The actors are amazing. 

End of the fucking world – two queer lady police officers and one is black. This show was relatively funny but very intense. Quite a few content warnings for this show like attempted sexual assault and animal death. It was a new concept for a show I’ve not seen before, it was pretty enjoyable. 

The president – gay/bi cis Male lead ? Bi cis Male lead? His girlfriend?? Gender nc black person. Main characters mother. I can’t lie, I didn’t finish this coz the more I watched, the less it made sense. I thought this show was a pile of shit but you might like it. 

Cat fight – one of the main women is in a wlw relationship. Both white cis women in the queer relationship(i re-read how i write this and it sounded like i meant the two leads, and no Sandra Oh is definitely not white haha). This was honestly also a pile of shit. Sandra Oh is in it which drew me in, but it’s just women beating each other up until one of them goes into a coma and loses all their shit, repeat.

Let it snow – two girls. One is Asian. Both played by queer actors, one is actually nonbinary too! I enjoyed the book but was pleased they added a queer story to the film. I do recommend this, it’s very cute and silly. 

Merry happy whatever – lesbian adult daughter previously married to a bloke, is not out to family. This was quite a weird show but I was into it. It’s Christmas with one family and you see all the in-laws have a secret meet up to get through living with this crazy family. 

The Durrells – Mrs. Durrell almost marries a man who turns out to be gay, he later on has a male partner. I think they have to move away as the community finds out.

Being Human – there was one cis white male couple in one episode and one of them dies and the other has to flea. The rest of the show is constantly queerbaiting, but if you can get past that, it’s pretty funny and plot I’ve never seen before for werewolves, vampires, and ghosts. Also the werewolf actor is gay.

Skins – Generation 1 we have lovely Maxxie. Generation 2 Emily is a lesbian and Naomi is bisexual. Generation 3 none of the truly main cast are gay but Frankie has two dads and her and Mini seem to have a bit of a queer relationship in the second series. There is also Alex, not a main character really but there is some emphasis on him for plot.

Dynasty – One of the leads in the family is gay.

October Faction – the son of the main family is Black and gay, has a few love interests dotted around including other POC. I honestly don’t remember watching this… only some bits.

The Half Of It – A lovely film about friendship and becoming okay with who you are. Asian queer lead. Wholesome watching. Some weird issues with plot/story telling/writing in some areas where character actions don’t seem to make a lot of sense… but as a whole it’s a lovely film and has great rep. Also MC’s dad is so sweet.

Glee – I’m late to Glee and I’m glad i didn’t waste my life on it in my youth and used it as a time fill during Lockdown. We have out main guys Kurt and Blaine who are both gay men, both have interactions with other gay men. Then we have lesbian Santana (Latina) and bi Brittany. Santana also sleeps with Quinn at a later date in series 5 I think. Adam Lambert does a cameo as a queer band member in season 5. There’s a Black trans woman in season 5 but totally overshadowed and mostly vague, she never had any real love interests. Then there’s another surprise trans character season 6 which I’m not fond of, clear it was just a dramatic plot shoehorned in rather than something pre-planned. Season 6 has another gay character who is a jock and finds love with a hipster kid. Also introduced is a queer coded 13 yo character.

Elite – a fantastic drama based in a high school in Spain where all the rich kids go. One of the rich kids is gay, another is bi and a selection of polyamorous relationships shown. One of the non-rich is a gay Muslim boy. There’s also suggestion a female character has multi-gender attraction but hasn’t had the chance to be shown in the show, I have my fingers crossed for season 3!

3% – a dystopian show with similar vibes to the Hunger games, everyone has to compete at age 16/18 I don’t remember it’s been a while to get into the luxurious life of the 3% but it’s a lot creepier than that. One of the main characters has multi-gender attraction to some extent, ends up with a character of the same gender. Not a lot of rep otherwise but I liked this addition. There’s also a Black disabled main character for a couple seasons.

Hollywood – a different timeline of Hollywood if things had gone a little better with accepting LGBT+ people and BIPOC. We have Rock Hudson and his writer lover, the Gas station of male sex workers who also serviced many gay men. Lots of gay male rep in this and Queen Latifa plays a queer woman (Hattie McDaniel) dating one of Hollywood’s most well known queer women, Tallulah Bankhead, who just kinda dated everyone apparently (I’m hoping Jessica Kelgred-Fozard makes a video on her). There is a bisexual actress, Anna May Wong, in a minor role whose sexuality is never addressed.

Black Lightning – one of the main characters (one of the sisters) is queer, I’ve not watched very far yet. Based around a Black superhero father who has the power to control electricity and his daughters start exhibiting powers too.

Dear White People – both the show and film, Lionel is gay, in the show he spends more time in the closet and slowly coming out. Struggles with being Black in the gay community but also gay in the Black community. There are a few latinx queer characters too. The story of Black students at Winchester University (an ivy league) fighting racism and trying to gain equality on campus. One of the more minor characters is actually a Black femme lesbian as well.

Dead to Me – had a lot of sapphic undertones but turns out one of our main characters is queer and gets into a bit of a pickle. Dead to Me is about a woman’s husband suddenly dying and his murderer feeling so guilty she befriends the wife without her knowing she murdered her husband and things spiral and get a bit crazy but it’s a great show with two amazing leading actresses. One of her love interests is also actually played by a queer actress.

Cheer – this was a weird one, kinda thriller-y. About cheerleaders who hate their new coach and try to ruin her life. The main character is a Black queer woman, it’s relatively clear she is sapphic but is keeping it a secret. Unsure if she is attracted to multiple genders or performing straightness. Same for the best friend and the Coach, not sure if it’s multi gender attraction or performative straightness/queerness depending on the situation. content warning: abuse of power. There’s a football coach (i think) but definitely some adult man who sleeps with the high school girls and also the female coach of the cheerleaders engages in some inappropriate behaviour with her students.

I hope you enjoy your viewing, my previous posts are here and here 

Happy Pride!

~ Artie

Check out all my other content here

Check out my queer Youtube content here

Winter Watching for The Gays This Holiday Season

let it snow

Hey pals,

I wanted to give you a little viewing suggestion in that weird moment between ChristmasLove Simon Launch One Sheet (1) and New Year for my fellow gays. It’s a short little list, but hey who cares!

Love, Simon: Not a Christmas film but has a very important section during Christmas. We love a Christmas coming out! This is generally a cute, warm film so felt it appropriate to include.

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Let It Snow: The new Netflix film based on the book written by three authors from three different perspectives. The added more P.O.V’s including a queer relationship and actually casted queer people to play them too! Another soft film with Love, Simon vibes, just totally in a blizzard!

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Merry, Happy, Whatever… : A Netflix show I stumbled upon about a very dysfunctional family and all their other-halves and how they all learn to accept each other and be more themselves. It also includes a coming out from someone who was initially married to the ‘opposite’ sex. It’s fun and frustrating but has a really great ending.

1_FdC8kqTR5MOgJQJZmmFiNwThe Christmas Set Up: a new one for 2020! The Actors are both gay and actually a real life married couple! Hugo goes home for Christmas for the first time in ages as he is a workaholic lawyer and meets Patrick, gorgeous, charming, rich, who was a few years ahead of Huge in school. The plot doesn’t always make sense, and it is pretty cringey in parts but this is a typical Christmas film, just featuring a gay couple! Definitely a fun, wholesome time.

I hope you enjoy watching these in your free time before the New Year, and I wish you all a splendid end to 2019.

~ Artie

Still open for new year’s tarot readings! hmu on twitter, £2 per card, up to 8 cards, all done via email or twitter messenger. Payment via paypal.

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Body Shaming When You’re Chronically Ill

Hey pals,

 

I’ve been hearing a lot about fatshaming in the medical industry and also general body shaming and certain standards people are expected to meet online recently. I have a long, complex history with my body and other people’s relationship to my body so these topics have brought up a lot for me I wanted to discuss.

 

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I don’t talk about my weight online, not in specific numbers anyway, because everyone changes their opinion of me once they hear the number. It doesn’t matter if its the weight on my scale or my BMI, people make a judgement they didn’t initially have. My BMI is currently in the ‘overweight’ category leaning close to ‘obese’, and I’m not trying to be up myself here but how am I nearly obese? I am an average mid-size person, but the NHS BMI calculator is saying I need to lose 26.5lbs (12kg/almost 2 stone) to be in the healthy weight range (not mid-healthy i mean barely in the range).

About 6 years ago I was two stone heavier and I received enough fat shaming from my NHS health team to make me want to die. I had to be weighed for my contraceptive pill and I had purposefully been avoiding the scale and said, “as long as you don’t tell me.” and stood on it. I did really well not to succumb to the temptation of looking all for my doctor to just outright tell me anyway! Of course as soon as I hopped in the car I googled the number into ones I understood. I always worked in lbs. And that night I wanted to die.

Before I had gotten to this weight, I was probably roughly the weight I am now maybe 10lbs lighter, and I’d finally decided to go ask for professional health with my disordered eating. I’d told him all the things I had done and been doing and how I was trying to stop doing them, and even though my behaviours fit best with Bulimia, he told me I had Binge Eating Disorder (BED) ignoring all of the self destructive things I was doing from starving myself to purging, I barely even binged, my binged were minute compared to other bulimics I’d met or other binge eaters. I was astonished. Part of his advice is what lead me to gaining so much weight so quickly and sending me even deeper into depression and triggering me more. All of the note books he gave me were for binge eating, not starving or purging or any of the other things I did. All because I was ‘overweight’ by BMI standards.

I’m disabled. I suffer with a lot of chronic pain. I have been told countless times to lose weight because that ‘will make it better’, without thinking about anything else going on with me. I suffer with so much fatigue I barely function 90% of the time. Exercise wipes me out for DAYS. But we should all exercise for 30 minutes a day and if you don’t YOU’RE LAZY.

 

At this point in my life, I am dealing with a very unstable IBD. As I write this, I feel nauseous and cannot eat my dinner and had a couple of bad episodes on the toilet because I accidentally ate something triggering to my stomach yesterday and now just have to suffer. I have barely moved from bed today. I also have an abscess in a VERY uncomfortable place which means I can’t do most of the exercises I’ve been recommended and felt able to do: walking sometimes aggravates it, I can’t sit on a bike seat so can’t get on my exercise bike for 15 minutes, I can’t really leave the house to go to the gym or a yoga class coz I might suddenly be in so much pain I can’t participate and may not be able to drive myself home. But I’m lazy for being overweight. I’ve fiddled with my diet constantly, partially coz I’ve had to cut out foods that trigger my IBD flares, but also trying to get the right nutrients into my body without fucking starving.

I’m bad at feeding myself, coz either I’ll forget and suddenly be so starving I feel sick, or all I do is EAT. I’ve been put on steroids that make you want to eat. At one point, I couldn’t stop eating even though I was so full I wanted to be sick. With an IBD, weight loss is BAD. Either your gut isn’t getting enough nourishment from your food or you’re shitting so much of it out so quick there’s no time for your body to absorb it. So, I guess at least they worry if I’m looking more trim lol.

 

“Just go for a walk,” they say, “anything to raise your pulse,” they say… but anything I like doing I’m not ‘allowed’ because of my disability so OF COURSE I’m not consistent with exercise you tell me I can’t do stuff I enjoy. One doctor even told me I only enjoy those things because I am good at them, because of my disability… is that a crime? Am I not allowed to enjoy things I can do? Ballet and yoga don’t hurt me as much a circuits or zumba (which gave me shin splints btw). I also found out recently I can’t even swim anymore because of muscle problems in my right arm, it’s too painful to actually swim… the number one recommended activity (which I also don’t really like but now I can’t even do)

 

We constantly see skinny people selling us health and size as if it’s easy to reach without a 6 figure paycheck, a personal chef, personal trainer and surgery tbh. And the ‘normies’ of the world who don’t have a disability or chronic illness that takes a toll on your energy and activity level like to cram it down our throats that we just aren’t doing enough. There’s 24 hours in a day, you can use 1 for exercise. But… I sleep 10 hours on average, some days more, I’m slower to do things, I have to remember to take 1500 pills morning and night, doctors appointments and how I’m going to get there and be emotionally prepared for what they are going to say, or wow I need to cook myself dinner but I can’t bring myself to stand in the kitchen nor think of a meal I could make… Check out the spoon theory if you need more explanation.

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Not everyone can walk their dog, or get to a gym, or AFFORD A MEMBERSHIP, or have you ever thought about the process of getting ready to swim and then getting ready to leave from swimming? Most changing rooms are hot and you’re sweaty and you can’t dry off and you can’t get your clothes on and now you’re dizzy and you might be sick! It really just goes on.

 

Most people, including doctors, do not think I am ‘overweight’ when they look at me. I carry my weight around my middle mostly so occasionally I jokingly call myself ‘skinny passing’.

 

Here’s a great experiment: Me, my mum, and my gran. Different heights, I’m 5’7, my mum 5’4, my gran 5’2. Carry our weight differently, mine is mostly my stomach and upper arms, my mum is mostly her bum and stomach, my gran is almost entirely her chest. Poor little woman with great old nunga-nungas. We are all very similar clothing sizes. My gran needed a size 18 to fit comfortably over her boobs. I’m roughly a 16/18 on top for broad shoulders and ribs and 14-16 on bottom for my skinny legs but wide waist. my mum is around 14-16 on bottom but she has issues with the waist being too loose or the calf area too tight. I moved into wearing more men’s clothes coz somehow a small will be tight fitting like a 14 in t-shirts but there’s not shame in wearing a men’s large or even extra large… because there’s no number. Men’s trousers are still a fucking mess if you ask me the waist size isn’t accurately in inches, I’ll tell you that for free.

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My fat friends don’t go to the doctor unless they really have to. They aren’t believed when they think something is seriously wrong, it’s all put down to weight. Skinny white women struggle to be listened to as it is in 2019. Imagine being anything else, poc, disabled, chronically ill, queer, trans, fat, no one listens to us and we have to learn to be a self advocate or bring a trusted person with us to help advocate when it’s too much. I have been spoken to like I’m a fucking idiot and been told how to wipe my own arse on more than one occasion by the same man (a surgeon btw, surgeons have zero social skills) as if I haven’t lived like this for a long time already. I am also belittled by other sick people who have had their disease longer than I have and tell me my case is mild when the last year of my life has been nothing but suffering.

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I’m just tired and angry at the able people out there making assumptions, and the doctors and nurses out there deciding they know what’s happening to my body before I finish telling them everything, and the other sick people who think they are better and more knowledgeable than me because they’ve had it longer or are older than I am. I’m angry for myself and I’m angry for my friends and I’m angry for my community.

I got enough to deal with, kindly, fuck off.

 

~ Artie.

Check out this post by Zipporah Arielle on getting comfortable talking about Crohn’s as there are many ways body shaming can sneak into your life as a disabled person.

15 More Netflix Shows and Films with LGBTQ+ Rep

Hey pals,

So I’m not feeling too up to writing some big deep meaningful post so I thought I’d throw together another LGBT+ rep on Netflix post of things I’ve watched since I made the last post or things I didn’t include because they were minimal! I’m bad with names and there may be spoilers, read at your own risk! Check out the original post here.

American Horror Story 

Murder House: Gay white male couple previous owners of house. It has been a while since I’ve seen this series so if I’ve missed any rep, sorry but I don’t want to re-watch it to figure it out. 

Hotel: Bi-coded vampires, gay man buying the hotel, Elizabeth Johnson (Lady Gaga’s character) is in a poly relationship with married couple, a wlw relationship with Ramona Royale, and sexualised preying on humans is pretty bi. 

Roanoke: Slave-owner and his lover (a slave), the old gay man who was a medium. Both reasonably minimal. 

Cult: Married lesbian/wlw couple. I’ve not watched much of this but they seem like a main focus. 

Trinkets: Lesbian main (also woc is mexican), loved her best friend who is in a wlw relationship with someone else, dates a fluid woman later in the series, cis white gay dude (the good kind for once who actually supports the main girls when they need it most and are alone), Mr D. a trans teacher. This show is a good example of having LGBT+ rep characters just for the sake of having LGBT+ characters. Nothing in the plot would be different if they were straight (except the fluid girl who dates a guy involved in the plot and one of the leads) and this is a show that decided to put rep in and show us we can really just exist. I really enjoyed this show and all three main characters a woc. The actress Brianna Hildebrand is bi, and Quintessa Swindell is nonbinary.

The Perfect Date: Black bestfriend who makes the app is gay and fancies a boy, very minor plot line. 

Shadowhunters: Alec is gay, mlm relationship with Magnus Bane who is bi spectrum immortal who has had relations with men and women. POC, magnus is asian and I think Alec is Latinx. Stopped watching after a while as it was very cringe, badly written and acted but really liked the queer couple. 

Orange Is The New Black: Everything is gay. Lots of GAY. Transwoman, lesbians, bi women, etc. Stopped watching coz they killed off my favourite gay. But they show all kinds of queer rep and it’s not all the same. 

Schitt’s Creek: Pansexual son who is pretty effeminate and camp. Nice to have some rep for more effeminate men on the bi spectrum. Specifically uses the term pansexual.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower: Gay best friend character who dates the closeted jock who is abused by his drunk dad. Sad side plot. 

Russian Doll: The main female character has a couple of queer friends who have queer interactions. One of them has like… an orgy that you see her wake up from. One of the actresses is gay (Rebecca Henderson).

Dumplin’: Main character’s friend, the actor is nonbinary but the character is unconfirmed LGBT+, could just be a butch feminist. Drag queens and gay men set in a gay bar. The Queens teach the girls how to be beauty pageant contestants.

Girl, Interrupted: Mains are kinda gay. I feel like there’s some queer coding between Suzanna and Lisa. A side character is in the psych ward for being a lesbian. 

The Longest Yard: Very over the top, could be seen as offensive, camp queer/cross-dressing men of colour. Could be trans? But this is an Adam Sandler film so… nothing is specific and likely offensive. 

Bridget Jones’s Diary: Bridget’s one male best friend is gay, hardly seen, is very camp. I don’t even know if we see him again after the first film actually. 

Dawson’s Creek: Had some early references to gay characters before introducing one into the main cast. There was a mention of a teacher in very early episodes. Spoilers, Andie’s brother Jack comes out as gay, there is a man soon after who is interested in him. A long standing family member of a main cast character is also gay. There’s not really any femme male rep or trans rep or lesbians, it’s pretty much white, cis, masc men. I loved the show but it wasn’t diverse. 

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I hope this list if helpful to you! Leave a comment with any show/film suggestions with some Queer rep, even if it is small, on Netflix or not!

~ Artie

Palm Springs is apparently very slightly queer with a casual bi scenario, I’ll link the article but have yet to watch it myself.

This is a show I’m not interested in watching but Star Trek: Discovery is finally including a trans and nonbinary character!