Browsing through the internet, staring longingly at beautiful stationary and even more beautiful handwriting, I came across someone’s handwriting sample. So, I don’t know, I wanted to do it and discuss my handwriting a little with you guys.
Can I just say how impressed with myself I am for this photo? It looks like a scan!
Anyway, here’s my writing sample. I want to talk about the big ugly scribble first. Why didn’t I just do it again? Because I wanted to make this realistic.
What has that got to do with handwriting? Well, everything actually. My brain doesn’t work as seamlessly as others when it comes to anything written. That includes numbers, letters, English, other languages, all kinds of words or written communication.
I had a re-diagnosis test for literacy the year I started uni (actually it might have been technically the one before? Either way, 2014/2015) I learned that my reading speed is ‘average’ and ‘university’ reading speed was two speeds higher than mine! And I found out that my comprehension and short term memory wasn’t super great either, it was better with things I actually liked and found interesting (shocker!) and since this test I’ve found it deteriorates with stress, sleep deprivation, boredom… I’ve never been a good sight reader either (though actually I found I was quite good compared to my university classmates?? This may be where my drama training helped me develop skills I lacked).
My brain skips words, reads pages and pages without taking any of it in, ‘learns’ without retaining (hi, what’s a verb?? says the Creative Writing degree graduate…), it swaps round letters and misreads 90% of fonts (BECAUSE THEY DON’T MAKE THE LETTERS LOOK DIFFERENT ENOUGH!), assumes words based on the beginning and ending letter… learning how to spell sucks (you don’t need to know how many spelling mistakes I made whilst writing this post alone), and it generally works faster or slower when it’s most inconvenient. Oh, and don’t get me started on trying to figure out how I learn best, coz it changes every time I think I’ve got it.
Now I’m getting to the point! If I try really hard (which I did) I can make my handwriting look somewhat passable and legible. But writing notes… my writing is kinda ugly (see the sentence I wrote out above? That’s still far nicer than my usual writing). So the big ugly scribbles are where my brain went too fast for my hand. I also mix lowercase letters with capitals all over the place, I’ve heard this is actually really common amongst people with dyslexia. I don’t have the capacity to write in cursive, I’ve tried many times and it looks God awful even though it was part of teaching when I was in primary school.
I struggle using a keyboard (note: I still can’t touch-type due to my dyslexia, I just can’t remember where the letters are) and though I love writing in public or having study dates, everyone knows when I’ve made a dumb typo. There’s lots of head-shaking, eye rolls, and most often face-pulling.
This post started as one thing in my head and became something else after I wrote up my sample.
My handwriting is ugly, but not in the typical and somewhat cool way where it looks like chicken scratch and a doctor or university lecturer could have done it. That kind of ugly handwriting is linked with intelligence… which is the opposite of how I felt growing up with dyslexia. I still feel pretty stupid to this day sometimes because of my dyslexia. Everything has been more work.
If anyone reading this relates to what I’ve said, let me know your experiences and if you’d like to hear more about my battle against dyslexia. Or if you can see some of the above signs in your children, I suggest taking them to be tested and really push for the extra help (not everywhere is good at providing support when necessary).
I hope you enjoyed reading this spontaneous piece.