5 Characters That Make Me

Hey pals,

This went around on Twitter recently (it was actually 4 characters, but I couldn’t narrow it down any further!) and I decided that these 5 characters, if you smushed them together and squinted a little, would make me. I didn’t get to explain this at all on Twitter, so I thought I’d do so here!

A big part of the factor is appearance. All dark short haired people who’re kinda androgynous. I’ll go through, character by character from here because it really does come down to their personalities and interests that makes me go ‘oh me’.

1. Klaus (number 4): Umbrella Academy. Sassy, queer, wears some funky outfit choices… Honestly an icon and I like to think of myself that way. I used to smoke as much as he does in the show so I still heavily relate.
2. Susanna Kaysen: Girl, Interrupted. One of several self-obsessed writers (which is my whole ass personality) who have made my list. She has BPD too, which… big mood. Though she is more on the quiet side, I find a lot of myself in her qualities, particularly her obsession with getting Lisa to like her and then realising how awful Lisa was for her and having the guts to return to therapy (or, inpatient for her…) But she shows you can regain control after a BPD diagnosis and I feel like I’ve shown this too.
3. Jughead Jones: Riverdale. The other obnoxious and narcissistic writer, who is super moody and an edgelord. I mean, me too. I think one of the main links between these characters is their sense of humour, they’re all very witty and have really fast responses. Jughead is definitely on the more deadpan / morose side of my humour. Also wearing hats in winter. I desperately upset there aren’t any cafes of diners near me that look like the one in Riverdale because you would definitely find me there on my laptop as well.
4. Haruhi Fujioka: OHSHC. I wish I was smart enough for a scholarship to a really expensive school, but Haruhi is kinda fluid and actually enjoys presenting as male and confusing people but doesn’t identify AS A MAN. SAME. Also, they call themselves dude and such and makes all the pretty boys uncomfortable. But also seduced them by accident (which is very not me, but I effing wish.)
5. Viola (particularly as Sebastian): She’s The Man. Again, some gender weirdness. Obviously, Viola doesn’t identify as a man or genderqueer BUT I high-key am obsessed with her trying to pull of being a dude. Also, entirely hilarious, I think I developed my facial expressions based off this movie alone.

As an overall, they generally encompass my choice of clothing (Except maybe Viola… very early 2000s yuck) all have similar length dark hair, and are sarcastic as all fuck. That’s all you really need to know.

(Oh also, my birthday is in a week !! show me some love with a donation?)

~ Artie